Practicing Mental and Spiritual Health

I feel that all of the exercises and meditations that we have completed in this class have been successful in some ways. The most common reason that an exercise was less helpful, usually, has more to do with my inability to let go of daily life. Because of this reason, I went back and tried those again. I found that both of our "Loving-Kindness" exercises to be greatly helpful in my own life. Not only do I look past my own suffering and onto the suffering of others, I learn to dissolve it as well. The simple act of wishing strangers well has been endlessly moving and positive for me. I also found that the "Subtle-Mind" exercise was able to give me insight into what my biggest opportunities for improvement actually were. In the last few weeks, I have implemented a daily exercise routine that I use in conjunction with these mental exercises. I have found that if I mentally allow myself to complete any of these while physically moving and pushing myself increasingly harder, I reach an amazing new realm of peace. I am sure that I will continue to use these exercises in my life, because that is exactly what integral health is about.

Meeting Aesclepius

Along with the mediation exercises required by this class, I have also begun to do some of my own. The Meeting Aesclepius exercise was deeply moving and easy for me to follow, especially considering my house was the opposite of quiet. I easily pictured someone who embodied wisdom, love, kindness and compassion and found that I could continue listening and following the speaker's words without hesitation. I pictured my great-grandmother. She passed away almost 15 years ago, but she had such an influence on my life. I often have pictured her in my mind when I found myself in difficult situations. Particularly when I chose to have natural childbirth and needed to find relief from the pain. It was her that I imagined comforting me, and it was her that calmed my fear. So there was no real thought involved in who would take the role of wisdom, love, and kindness in my mind. When this exercise was finished, I felt an amazing sense of calm. Realizing that because her influence on me (even though I was only a child) was so great, I became her. It is an amazing thought that I could be like my favorite person, that I could ever embody the level of love, wisdom, and kindness that she always did. 

We often look for others to help us reach our desired level of integral health. I believe that it is important to find someone well trained in the field to give us the best possible solutions for our own path to wellness. The saying "One cannot lead another where one has not gone himself" means that someone who is in a position of leadership must fully understand and personally use the methods that he suggests to those following him. In order to successfully assist others' health, one must develop their own. The healthcare professional has an obligation to clients to lead by example. Those who seek do offer this service to others must remain diligent on their own path to human flourishing as well. The same methods of meditation, loving-kindness, and calm-abiding mind should be used by professionals helping others seek the same level of spiritual and psychological growth. 

Integral Assessment/Universal Loving-Kindness

This week's blog required me to complete two tasks: The universal loving-kindness meditation and the integral assessment. Both of these helped me immensely to help understand the direction that I need to take to become the person I want to be.

The universal loving-kindness meditation was moving and emotional. I guess this is directly effected by the unrest in my personal life, yet I maintained my focus on the suffering of others. This helped me realize how many others are burdened with much deeper suffering than I could imagine. To reach past my own selfish, petty issues and wish others freedom from their suffering was emotionally charging to say the least.

For the integral assessment I chose personal/family issues within the interpersonal quadrant. Focusing my energy into healing the specific relationship, I asked myself what growth and development could help in the healing process.

I took time to myself to meditate, putting all of my energy into how I felt about the situation as a whole. Then I began to write freely about what I could do to reach a more desirable outcome. Through the flowing words on paper, I realized that I allowed my emotions to overreact to the situation and my actions actually caused someone else emotional harm. I decided that a better way to attempt to resolve the situation would have been to openly discuss my feelings instead of drawing conclusions and making rash assumptions. This is the growth I seek to develop as a person and is needed to avoid these types of situations. If I completely understand my feelings and can communicate them clearly without hurting someone then I will have made a step into the direction that I would like to go as a person towards integral health.

The Subtle Mind

This week we have focused on Dascher's Subtle Mind, and while I found it to be easier to achieve than last week's Loving Kindness exercise, I still was not extremely successful. I think this has much to do with my upcoming wedding closing in quickly and realizing that I am not finding time to allow for relaxation and meditation as much as I would like.

This is leading me to lose the positive connection that my spiritual wellness adds to my mental and physical wellness. I am finding that because I do not allow time for spiritual activities, that I am becoming more stressed. This, in turn, leads me to being more stressed because I am not allowing time for spiritual activities. It is a vicious cycle. I must make the time to fully commit to my spiritual well-being. I can no longer allow stress to take over and worry to grow roots.

I also spent the last week absolving a detrimental relationship that has been causing me heartache for a while. I allowed a person to drown me in her own negativity until I could no longer keep my head above water. This week's reading helped me realize how harmful holding onto that relationship was for me, so I simply let it go. I feel relief and sadness at the same time, but I now realize that I should not have allowed someone to affect how I viewed my own life. If I can give anyone advice, it is to love those who truly love you as well. Do not harbor guilt for dissolving friendships/relationships that cause you harm. You are an amazing person and require more than that.

Loving Kindness Exercise

After last week's exercise, I knew that I would have to use my time alone while the children are at school to complete these exercises. No more trying to clear my mind while giggling, footsteps, or any other disruptions are going on in the house.

Beginning this unit's reading during the holiday break, was a good idea as well. Work has been even more stressful than usual. Our children spent a week with their other parents, and like usual, came back with horrible attitudes. I have felt like I was fighting a losing battle. Trying to work retroactively to keep harmony everywhere I go has been nothing short of impossible.

This week's "Loving Kindness" exercise was great to look beyond all of the things that stress me. Feeling warm affection for those who are suffering with whatever their problems may be is even deeper than simply treating others as you would have them treat you. This is beyond the golden rule for me. This is expressing loving kindness to everyone, even those who are not particularly kind or friendly to me. Usually, it is difficult to achieve because we hold onto our own pain, suffering, and hard feelings. I think that this exercise first helped me release my own stress, and then take the negativity that is all around me and relieve that as well. I would definitely say that this week's exercise has been successful for me.